What’s the show? Attack on Titan (2013).
And what’s it about? Well… it’s a dark and violent anime set in a world where all of humanity has to live behind a giant walled city because outside are massive humanoid like creatures called ‘titans’ that straight up eat people. Some of them are like 10 feet high whereas others can be up to 200 feet high, its seriously scary and seriously messed up! The story follows three teenage aged friends who have their world turned upside down by a titan attack and end up joining the military to fight the titans to help save what’s left of their downtrodden civilization.
Wow. That sounds cool! Nah, it sucks.
Wait, what? But you made it sound so good! Shhh! Listen… I can’t actually admit to liking Attack on Titan, I can’t risk that kind of hit to my rep.
Huh? What are you talking about? If people hear that I actually like this show then they’ll think I’m just latching onto what is “popular” amongst the “casual” anime fans. And I can’t do that! I’ve only just gotten into Bakemonogatari fan-circles, if they find out I like stuff like this I’m done for!
Heh, I never thought you were this shallow. I’m not. It’s the opposite in fact, only jocks and white people watch AoT, I’m way too indie for that. In fact that reminds me I’ve got to check in with the Paranoia Agent original DVD owner subreddit I set up, but I suppose you’ve never even heard of that anime… huehuehue.
So you’re an anime hipster who secretly is into all the stuff that everyday anime fans are into? Well let’s not go crazy, it’s Attack on Titan we’re talking about, it’s not like I’m suddenly going to DBZ meet ups!
So why is Attack on Titan a taboo among anime aficionados? Normies man, f***ing normies…
Right. Well let’s pretend that you’re not into AoT. I’m totally not!
Indeed, so that said, what are some things you just hate about it? Just hate *wink*. Ah… oh! I get you, heh. Right, so I just hate how the main characters of Eren, Mikasa and Armin have so much intertwining backstory and that they care so much for each other. Like you’d think Eren seeing his mother be brutally devoured by a titan would harden him up but instead he’s being all vulnerable and troubled by the memories of it. Pfft, as if you’d be a three-dimensional character, totally lame!
Ah, yeah, right! Lame! Umm, so what else? Well the action is just like… so… totally…
Yes? I mean, the action it’s just…
Err, it’s totally lame right, go on and tell me about how lame it is. Yeah? Argh! I can’t! I can’t keep this flawlessly brilliant and convincing ruse up! I really like Attack on Titan, I do! Damned be to all those reckless haters, conjuring up bile for a series just because it’s popular! So what if it is? Sometimes popular things are also good, popularity isn’t always mutually exclusive of quality, this isn’t high school, this is anime!
And the action, then? The action is fantastic, the fluidity of the animation as the characters fly about with their Omni Directional Mobility gear and begin slicing at the Titan’s with their swords and then invariably some oft forgotten side character gets blindsided and you watch as they become TitanChowTM before your very eyes, and it’s all so visceral and impactful and dramatic.
Well you don’t need to sell it to me anymore I’m already so sold it’s being giftwrapped! Baka Gaijin…
I beg your pardon? Sorry, it’s a gut reaction, I’m sure it’ll pass in time.
Mmm, right. So anything else you want to add? Attack on Titan did nothing wrong. I mean not literally, I was just doing a meme right there. It’s not perfect, there are some serious pacing abnormalities throughout, but that’s more to do with it being such a faithful adaptation of the manga. And it’s depressing too, which I wouldn’t expect anything less but just be wary of it, especially if your go to anime usually involves ‘cute girls doing cute things’.
So no cute girls here then? Mikasa’s a BAMF, and also dayum…
Geez, I thought I’d like you reviewing something mainstream but somehow your more insufferable than when you’re reviewing niche weirdness and obsessing over ‘cute girls’. Just be thankful I’m not reviewing Fairy Tail any time soon.
I can’t even begin to think what that means. So, final score? Forget whatever presumptions you have about the super popular Attack on Titan, whether you’re an anime connoisseur or completely new to anime entirely, AoT is a dramatic and violent but wholly satisfying and tense place to start. A colossal and hard fought, 92 out of 100.